| Only
women can |
Only
men can |
| Understand
why Sarah Ferguson is a heroine |
Understand why Alex Ferguson has got away with it
for so long |
| Navigate
the Spaghetti Junction while plucking eyebrows |
Appreciate
that motor-racing is a sport |
| Attribute
the characteristics they would like to have themselves
to their cats – e.g. plump but sleek, purry,
deadly hunter |
Attribute
the characteristics they would like to have themselves
to their dogs –- e.g. randy rascal, tough
but nice |
| Still
secretly fancy buying the latest Barbie |
Actually
buy the latest Playstation game |
| Think
Sleepless in Seattle is a great film |
Watch Taxi Driver four or five times |
| Quote
the orgasm scene word for word from When Sally Met
Harry, but only with other women |
Believe
it when their lover tells them they are "the
best ever" |
| Know
the calorific value of any food even if never seen
before |
Know
that government advice on alcohol intake is ludicrously
conservative |
| Know
why party selling really works |
Know
why advertisers hire helicopters to make films about
cars going up and down mountain roads |
| Know
why you never want to hear the real answer to "‘does
my bum look big in this?" |
Can’t
find the salt even when told that it’s in the middle
of the fourth shelf down |
The
Sex War No. 4391
TOP